The Perfect Diet!

[preachaboy08]

This diet is designed to help you cope with stress that builds up during the day.

THE NON-STRESS DIET This diet is designed to help you cope with stress which
normally builds up during the day.

** Breakfast
Grapefruit
1 Slice Whole Wheat Toast, Dry
8 oz. Skim Milk

** Lunch
4 oz. Lean Broiled Chicken Breast
1 cup Steamed Spinach
1 cup Herb Tea
1 Oreo Cookie

** Mid-Afternoon Snack
Rest of the Oreos in the package
2 Pints Rocky Road Ice Cream
1 Jar Hot Fudge Sauce Nuts, Cherries, Whipped Cream

** Dinner
2 Loaves Garlic Bread with Cheese
Large Sausage, Mushroom & Cheese Pizza
4 Cans or 1 Large Pitcher of Root Beer
3 Milky Way or Snickers Candy Bars

**** Rules For This Diet ****

1. If you eat something, and no one else sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. When drinking a diet soda while eating a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are
canceled by the diet soda.
3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count as long as you don't
eat more than they do.
4. Foods used for medicinal purposes *never* count. Example: hot chocolate,
toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.
5. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.
6. Movie-related foods do not have calories because they are part of the
entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel. Example: Milk Duds,
buttered popcorn, Junior Mints, and Tootsie Rolls.
7. Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking the cookie causes
calorie leakage.
8. If you are in the process of preparing something, foods licked off knives and
spoons have no calories. Examples: peanut butter on a knife and ice cream on a
spoon. Foods of the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are
green salad and Key Lime pie, mushrooms and white chocolate.
Note: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other.

[*~Jenn~*]

LOL
 The 2nd one makes so much sense!

2. When drinking a diet soda while eating a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are
canceled by the diet soda..

LOL